how things never seem to stay the same..

isnt it amazing how as we grow up and change inside the things we surround our selves with change as well? i started going to two bible studys this fall and as i have it seems that my "friends" are drifting further and further away, and when we talk its just a dead end conversation that after just two mintues it seems like there is nothing left to say, with one bible study i am making new friends and could easily stick around after we get done and talk for hours. i have been finding myself wanting to further my self more and more from the past and hold on tight to the future. does that make me petty? i have no clue but i do know that i am much happier when im distancing myself from the "drama" of some peoples lives, as im sitting here looking at my facebook friends list i look at who is on there and i really think sometimes that it would be so easy to just delete them off there and not ever look back, but then again what if one status i share about God or one bible verse will be enough to help them out.

then i look at another friend who i have been talking to and really been feeling like i need to share about the lord to her, and i have again and again and again, i have told her how to not make mistakes i do, i really felt like i was getting some where and then BAM she throws in my face that i dont get the loneliness i have a ring on my finger and a man in my bed at night so i just dont get it.. she takes everything i have said to her and totally ignores me and rushes out of town to go meet a guy.. ugh i just dont get it! i know that satan is working just as hard to pull her away as i am to help her find the lord but oh man am i ever frustrated!!

the power of prayer

isnt is amazing how as chirstians we are told to pray, prayer is the most powerful thing we have... but do we really listen? i know that through all i have been put through up until just a few days ago i didnt realize jut how true that is. when we are placed in situations that are so hard or hurtful to go through we try to deal with them ourselves, we try to fix the situation our way not God's way. trust me i did that myself up until just last week actually, sure i would pray occasionally and "give it to God" but i never fully let it go. but due to recent events i have finally realized how imporatant it is to just give it to god. Anthony and i came together in prayer and prayed and prayed and prayed and when anthony told me how he felt i respected that and even tho i didnt agree at the time i let it go the way he said.. and wow God has preformed some AMAZING things in just a few days. we had a conversation that was very hard to have but needed to be said, before we started we gave it to God we asked him for the words and he gave them to us, was it any easier no, but did it have a huge impact yes! i am just so thankful that I am not like Abraham in that he only heard from God 8 times in his entire life, and that was not a short life either yet he has so much faith in God.. I can hear from God at any time all i have to do is walk in to my bedroom and grab my bible or grab my phone and pull up a bible app on it and i can hear from God, everything i need to know every question i have is all answered in there. that is SO amazing. and while i have been struggleing and stressing the past year over things that i felt i had no control in God was using that to bring me to my knees to realize my issues were bigger than me alone. now i still cant quote scripture but im working on that, but i can tell you that once i fully gave it to God and knew that with out him i was getting no where he has changed my heart so much. i am normally a very anxious person and just the past few days i can feel myself calming down. and that in its self is a miracle. i guess more than anything i am just glad that God is answering our prayers in the ways that he is. because trust me the talk we had the other day could have went a very different way than it did.